It calls out to me. "wrrrite a sequel. title it 'the walk'. make it seeexy."
The Talk
Sean Cassidy once gave up cigarettes, when he was fifteen, because his throat began to ache for reasons he couldn't understand, and he thought it was the smoke. Nicotine addiction is like alcoholism, though-- it's an itch that never goes completely away, especially in an occupation like his, and he occasionally gave in to the impulse when facing situations of acute stress. The morning he went in to give the Sex Lecture to the kids, he smoked half a pack.
He'd been twenty-five when he'd first met Professor Xavier, and much too old for the Sex Lecture; but he'd seen it since then, given to several generations of blushing young heroes. Charles had a tried and true formula. Speak in generalities; maintain formality until the end, at which point a sardonic smile is called for, but not too wide, lest it be interpreted as a creepy old man leer; and, above all-- above all, Sean-- refrain from personal anecdotes.
It wasn't even that Sean was nervous, really. It was just that this was a very important lesson, one that he couldn't afford to mess up by, doing, whatever. He stubbed out his cigarette on the pavement. Or, maybe he was a little nervous. He was *Catholic*, for God's sake.
"Alright, children," he said, walking into the classroom and shutting the door. "I've some good news. Yuir trigonometry exam has been postponed." Jubilee raised her palms to the ceiling and mouthed "thank you", and Paige looked worried.
"Is something wrong, sir?"
"Nae, lass," Sean said, looking around at his students' faces. "Not a thing." The desks were arranged a semi-circle, like they always were, and Paige was seated between Jubilee and Angelo-- Angelo looked bored with a sort of half-grimace, like he knew that a trig test would never be postponed for something that wasn't much worse. Everett was smirking at Jubilee's relief, to his right-- and Jono, who was sitting on the other side of Angelo, had an eyebrow cocked. At the far right end, Monet was impassive, as always.
"I need to have a talk wi' the lot of you, is all."
"About what?"
"Well, Paige--" Sean smiled, and immediately froze. _No, no, smile at end! Smile at END!!_ He gulped a deep breath, which tangled in the cigarette smoke still lingering in his throat, and he doubled over in a coughing fit. Everett jumped up and began clapping him on the back, but Sean waved him off.
"I'm, I'm alright," he said and coughed. "sit, sit."
Everett sat, and Sean took a moment to regain his composure. The children now all shared expressions of concern and confusion. Except for Monet, who looked the same.
"Yes, alright. Now. A talk." He took a chair from behind the teacher's desk and sat, and crossed and uncrossed his left leg, and then stood again. "Yeh're all . . of a good age. Yeh've all seen things that most people yuir age haven'."
"Jubilee's been to space," Angelo offered, grinning. "What?" he said, looking over at her, "You know you were gonna bring it up, gringa." Jubilee flipped him off.
"That's actually an excellent example, Ange," Sean said, holding up a hand to stall any retort, a small voice in his mind screaming, _generalities!!_ "Jubilee has been ta space. And all of yeh have seen battle. Yeh've all been in situations that've forced yeh t'think and act like *adults*, much sooner than yeh would have had to as regular teenagers. And I understand that it can be a very . . very *adult* world."
"Oh, shit!" Jubilee crowed, jumping out of her seat. "I know what this is!"
"Jubilee," Sean said, pleadingly.
"This is the Sex Talk!!"
"Jubilee."
"Sex Talk?" Paige asked. "Aren't we a little old t'be gettin' a sex talk?"
"No, no, guys, listen." Jubilee looked impossibly excited, her face split in a huge grin, and she jumped a little. "This is the special Hero Sex Talk. Where we learn that just 'cause we run around in spandex, stirrin' up battle hormones, we can't just be havin' sex all the time. This is a total rite of passage, y'all."
"A rite of passage?" Everett asked. He turned to Sean, who was sitting again, head down. "Is this a rite of passage, Mr.Cassidy?"
"What does that have t'do with space, Mr.Cassidy?" Paige asked.
"I was leadin' up to the sex, Paige-- and, not really, lad." Sean looked up. "Sit down, Jubilee." She did a small dance, and then sat. "Children," he said. The looks now, he noticed, were mostly amusement, even on Monet-- except for Paige and Everett, who were exchanging cringes.
"Children. Yeh run around in unstable molecules, stirring up battle hormones. It's a proven psychology that the urge t'reproduce-- or affirm life, at any rate-- is an instinctive reaction ta stress and/or life-threatening situations. Which yeh see alot of. If yeh gave inta those impulses everytime y'were faced wi' that-- well. Not only is there a physical danger in that, but, it adds a wee element o' volatility into a place where interpersonal dynamic is-- of the upmost importance. Y'understand."
Angelo raised his hand. "Are we gonna be tested on this?" and Jubilee grinned.
"Yeah, man-- if we accidentally *do* have sex with everybody, do we fail the class?"
"That's--" Sean shook his head, looked down at his hands, palm-up. "That's it, that's the lecture. I gave the Sex Talk." He looked up at his students. "Just, stay aware a' yuirselves, children. Keep in mind the proper time an' place, and motivation, for, engaging in, whatever."
For the first time, Monet spoke. She was smiling. "Mr.Cassidy-- why didn't Ms.Frost deliver this lecture?"
Sean looked out the window and sighed.
"She said it was a rite of passage."
me